Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
