remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
