I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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