I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
