im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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