I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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