this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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