At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
