Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
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