ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
he puts the penis in happiness.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize