So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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