mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
He did a backflip because drugs
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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