I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Fuck appropriateness.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
