i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
