just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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