Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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