Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
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