Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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