am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
