You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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