is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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