He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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