Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
