he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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