I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Randomize