do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I take back everything I said about communal showers
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
