would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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