Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
