doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
