i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
