I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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