I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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