If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
