the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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