thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Randomize