i think my tv is drunk
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
