How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
