Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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