from now on my penis is your penis
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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