Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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