never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
