In the future we'll all be gay
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize
