I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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