Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Randomize
