Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Randomize
