We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
