# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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