you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
