At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
