ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
