just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
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